Entry Fourteen

I had so much to write about earlier. I was so depressed and pissed off and angry and... then I got on the computer and did job searches and filled out applications and then I got hungry and then I read a bit ("Juliet, Naked" by Nick Hornby), and read a bit more, and then I saw I only had fifty more pages to go so I finished it, but I wasn't in the mood to do anything strenuous, so I grabbed the next book in my stack and read some more ("Gang Leader For A Day" by Sudhir Venkatesh) until I started to doze off.

I hate looking for work and applying for jobs and filling out applications. I feel like a failure. I have a friggin' masters degree for chrissakes. Why is it so hard to get employed??

I just want to work.
I swear to God I'll work for free for a week just to show you I'm an amazing employee. Just hire me.

Please.

It's so hard to think and act positively when things are going badly.

I should have written earlier. This wouldn't have been so rambling and whiny and poor-me.

I'll do better. I'll be better.

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